Ok. So basically if you would like to know what my day was like in one word, it would be this: Crappy... But, I think you would like me to elaborate?
This morning I had to get up at a, what my friend calls, ungodly hour. I had to do school, take my dog to folsom to have her groomed, had to go to the doctor, (stupid stupid stupid doctors!!!) and then come home. My day was stressfull. I almost got killed twice. Yes, true near death experiences, no lie.
Friends... Friends are amazing. They keep me going. They make me happy. When I think I'm going to cry they either cheer me up or let me cry on their shoulders. I can't live without them. They are sent to me by God. I remember that everyday. Especially as of late.
I don't have a point to this blog. I am just going to rambel for a bit. Do you ever feel like your world is crashing down around you? Do you ever feel like no matter what you do there is no escape? Do you ever feel, that out of the clear blue, someone is thrown into ur life and they rescue you from that which you thought there was no escape? I have. I have come as close to the brink of falling into the darkest hole I've ever encountered, and then, suddenly this hand reached out and saved me. The funny thing is, this person, this person who seemed like my guardian angel, doesn't even know. They were just there. The things they said, the way they treated me, no matter how normal it was, it saved me from doing things I would have regretted for the rest of my life.
Have you ever felt like that? If you have not, I can tell you it is one of the utmost amazing, freeing, beautiful moments you could experience. It's like, all of the sudden, when you are with that person, it seems like you are safe; like nothing could go wrong even though you know in your mind that everything has gone wrong. When you realize you have that person, and that they make you feel that way, it leaves you breathless. I can't say everyone will experience this. Alot of people would never go through something so terrible that they would have to experience this, but if you do, you will understand exactly what I am talking about.
I said there wasn't a point to this blog, but suddenly, I feel enlightened enough to make one. Do not, and I mean never, under ANY circumstances, give up on the beauty of life. There will be times when you feel like it is the ugliest most despicible thing ever, but it isn't. If you would give it a chance, you would start to see the beauty of it again. The people who love you; that is beautiful. You will always have that even if you lose everything else.
"vivo amare imparare"
Hannah
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Sunday, May 4, 2008
Music Evolved
So below is an example of a truly odd musical composition. One that is VERY popular.
Barenaked Ladies
One Week (lyrics)
It's been one week since you looked at meCocked your head to the side and said "I'm angry"Five days since you laughed at me saying"Get that together come back and see me"Three days since the living roomI realized it's all my fault, but couldn't tell youYesterday you'd forgiven mebut it'll still be two days till I say I'm sorry
Hold it now and watch the hoodwinkAs I make you stop, thinkYou'll think you're looking at AquamanI summon fish to the dish, although I like the Chalet SwissI like the sushi 'cause it's never touched a frying panHot like wasabe when I bust rhymesBig like LeAnn RimesBecause I'm all about valueBert Kaempfert's got the mad hitsYou try to match wits, you try to hold me but I bust throughGonna make a break and take a fakeI'd like a stinkin achin shakeI like vanilla, it's the finest of the flavoursGotta see the show, cause then you'll knowThe vertigo is gonna growCause it's so dangerous,you'll have to sign a waiver
How can I help it if I think you're funny when you're madTrying hard not to smile though I feel badI'm the kind of guy who laughs at a funeralCan't understand what I mean?Well, you soon willI have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeveI have a history of taking off my shirt
It's been one week since you looked at meThrew your arms in the airand said "You're crazy"Five days since you tackled meI've still got the rug burns on both my kneesIt's been three days since the afternoonYou realized it's not my faultnot a moment too soonYesterday you'd forgiven meAnd now I sit back and wait til you say you're sorry
Chickity China the Chinese chickenYou have a drumstick and your brain stops tickin'Watchin' X-Files with no lights onWe're dans la maisonI hope the Smoking Man's in this oneLike Harrison Ford I'm getting franticLike Sting I'm tantricLike Snickers, guaranteed to satisfy
Like Kurasawa I make mad filmsOkay, I don't make filmsBut if I did they'd have a SamuraiGonna get a set a' better clubsGonna find the kind with tiny nubsJust so my irons aren't always flying off the back-swingGotta get in tune with Sailor Moon'Cause the cartoon has got the boom anime babesThat make me think the wrong thing
How can I help it if I think you're funny when you're madTryin' hard not to smile though I feel badI'm the kind of guy who laughs at a funeralCan't understand what I mean?Well, you soon willI have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeveI have a history of losing my shirt
It's been one week since you looked at meDropped your arms to your sidesand said "I'm sorry"Five days since I laughed at you and said "You just did just what I thought you were gonna do"Three days since the living roomWe realized we're both to blame,but what could we do?Yesterday you just smiled at meCause it'll still be two days till we say we're sorry
It'll still be two days till we say we're sorryIt'll still be two days till we say we're sorryBirchmount Stadium, home of the Robbie
So why did I post this truly twisted song? Could I possibly have any sane reason for it? Well the answer to that is yes. I most certainly have a reason. If it is sane, well, I cannot guarantee you of that. I have been contemplating music lately. I know this is a dangerous subject to get into because people's tastes in music very just as much as their DNA. (not exagerating.)
So here it is. I was thinking about how much people's tastes really do very. Some people will only listen to Mozart, Chopin, and verious other "greats" in the classical era of music. They think it almost a sin to listen to modern music because they believe that modern musicians and composers have destroyed what was once great. Personally, I think that music has evolved in many great ways. There are no doubt many absolutely dreadfull compositions that should never have been released to the public, but there are also many things that I think have been beneficial to the public musically. The thing about music is, no matter who you are, where you are, what you look like, sound like, or act like, you can relate to music. It is a language spoken around the world. From the Alps in Europe to the Bronx in New York there is music along with an abundance of listeners who approve of what they are hearing. The music verries from culture to culture, but everywhere where there is a human being alive, there will be music. Even if it is a simple melody hummed while they are working.
Just as art has developed and evolved over the past one hundred years so has music. Just as Pablo Picasso revolutionized every human beings definition of art in the mid 20th century with his abstract designs and ideas of using geometric shapes to create paintings, music has evolved from the "classical" forms to where it is now. In the beginning of the 20th century people were starting to explore new ways to make sounds. They started playing one composition in more than one key at the same time. They truly revolutionized "sound."
My point is this, music will ALWAYS be here. As long as there is one human being on the face of the planet, there WILL be music. Music will always evolve. Take for example how music has evolved just from the early 80's! We went from pop rock music and boy bands being the most popular thing to hard rock bands and R&B being loved all over again. Music will always be changing. Just as cultures change and grow into something new music will grow along with it. This is why I am not a "traditionalist" when it comes to the art of music. I have a respect for each and every musical style out there. Even if I do not particularlly enjoy listening to it I know that an individual person put part of their soul into producing that sound that makes that style distinct among all others.
I have a lot more to say on this subject but I am afraid that if I write much more you will get bored with me and move on to more interesting things like what's new with "brangelina" or "tomcat." *rolls eyes*.
So I will now end this blog. Feel free to comment and tell me your opinions. If there is one thing I love talking about it is music. Because no matter what, we can all relate to it in one way or another.
That's it for the world outside my window.
"vivo amare imparare"
~Hannah~
Thursday, May 1, 2008
True or False?
They say you can only deny the truth for so long before you have to face it. Why do we hide from the truth? Why do we deny it? Is it only for the safety of our own sanity? Do we really obtain some sense of peace from ignoring that which burdens our hearts and minds?
Any fool can run from his fears; but it takes a wise and brave soul to face his trials. To stare in the face that which terrifies you most and say "I will not be bound by you any longer." Now that, that is a true test of one's strength.
To hide from the truth is to hide from yourself. If you hide from it long enough, you may just lose who you are. What we know and what we accept as truth shapes us; it makes us into who we are and who we will become in the future. Therefore, deny the truth? Deny yourself? Or are they one in the same?
Wisdom and knowledge is not the same thing. One may have knowledge and not be wise, but the wise must have knowledge and exercise it in the proper way. If we ignore the truth, we become fools. If we face it, it is an example of wisdom.
"Vivo amare imparare"
~Hannah~
Any fool can run from his fears; but it takes a wise and brave soul to face his trials. To stare in the face that which terrifies you most and say "I will not be bound by you any longer." Now that, that is a true test of one's strength.
To hide from the truth is to hide from yourself. If you hide from it long enough, you may just lose who you are. What we know and what we accept as truth shapes us; it makes us into who we are and who we will become in the future. Therefore, deny the truth? Deny yourself? Or are they one in the same?
Wisdom and knowledge is not the same thing. One may have knowledge and not be wise, but the wise must have knowledge and exercise it in the proper way. If we ignore the truth, we become fools. If we face it, it is an example of wisdom.
"Vivo amare imparare"
~Hannah~
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
The tragedies of over thinking and under acting
Ok, I am going to start this blog off by saying, that below is something I wrote last night. I did not have a computer so I did something extreamly out of character. I picked up a pen and some paper and started to scrawl it out. I have not done that for a very long time, but this was far to important to leave to write till the next day. This blog is directed more towards women than men. But you guys are welcome to read it, maybe you will learn a few things too.
**********************************************************************************
This is one for all you cynics out there.
Why is it that so constantly, all of the seemingly "good" men out there are often attached to women who's IQ's are lower than Britney Spear's and Paris Hilton's IQ's pooled together? Come on ladies, Haven't most of us thought this at least once in our life, even if it was only for a moment? Is it because they feel impowered because they are smarter? (I use the word "smart" loosly) Is it all just a power trip? Do "they," those females who laugh at everything and seem to think only about nonsense really have anything we are incapable of posessing?
All of my writing up until this point seems to be nothing but a never ending stream of questions. However, I am now going to give some of my answers. First off, why do men choose the above described type of women? I do not have an answer for this. Now wait! Before you give up and decide not to read any further because I am dissapointing you, STOP! I am going to say something important. Ready? Not all men choose women like that. Just because he may appear "good" does not mean he is. Also, the type of woman a man chooses says alot about him.
What do you think when you see a guy who is out with a total, well, a total tramp? Do you think he is dating her to find out what her favourite book is? I think not. But there are a few "good" men out there who truely not only appear good, but indeed are. Ladies, what I am trying to say is this: THERE IS HOPE!! Do not settle. Never settle for less, because one of those good ones may come along one day and you will be taken, so he will move on.
Now, time for some tough love. Not all of the blame can be placed on men for dating the type of women I described earlier. You may complain and say that it is unfair that "he" would choose someone like that over you. But hear me now. There is always a reason. Now for that tough love. I said earlier, do they "really have anything we are incapable of posessing?" The answer to that is no. Flat out NO. However, they do have some things many of us often ignore as being important qualities when we are in a relationship.
1. A good sense of humor
2. Enjoying HIM. (don't panic! info to come.)
3. Having fun
Now as far as number one is concerned, a good sense of humor is key. Ok, now I am going to be a bit "harsh" as some of my friends call me. Many women refuse to find their man's jokes funny. Now, do not get me wrong, I know that alot of the time, they are not funny, but when they are, we often refuse to laugh. This is a strange phenomenon, but you must agree that it often occurs.
Number two. Enjoying HIM. Ok, this probably comes accross as confusing to some of you, but I will try to explain myself. Enjoy who he is, not who you want to make him into. Laugh at his dumb jokes. Love how he can make you laugh at anything. Tell him how much you adore that he can always cheer you up just by being there. LET him cheer you up. All these things seem totally simple right? that's because they are! We are often just to preoccupied with thinking because of that high IQ of our's that we forget to do the little things.
Number three. Have fun. I know what you are thinking. "She's kidding right? We all know how to have fun." Well I am not going to tell you how to have fun, but I am going to tell you it is something we often overlook. Why? Let me give you an example. You are cooking an amazing, romantic dinner for you and your significant other. The pasta burns. You spill sugar all over the floor. (OH MY GOSH!! ANTS!) And your precious dog decides to chew up your favourite pair of shoes. Therefore, he get's there and says, "let's go to the pizza parlor." Are you likely going to have much fun under the circumstances? No. Why? Because you are stressed out because you think everything was ruined for the night. Here is what you should learn to do. Let go of yourself. Have fun. Because, no matter where you are, what you are eating, or what you are wearing on your feet, all that matters is him. We get so stressed out that we forget to have fun. So remember to enjoy him, because it is the most important thing.
Just doing these three little things makes you more appealing to those "good" men. Why? Because they want the real you. Not the stressed out, compleatly not fun version you become once you have a boyfriend. Like I tell many people, my motto is "vivo amare imparare." English, "I live to love and to learn." Live your life. Love those people you have, and learn from that which you love so dearly.
Now as a fun, slightly demented and yet quirky side note, I would like to share a break up quote that one of my best friends shared with me.
There are phases of a break up
1. Not believing it's true.
2. Realizing it is true.
3. Crying because you feel as if you have lost your best f riend.
4. ANGER.
5. Considering thoughts of keying his car.
6. Keying his car with your friends.
7. Regretting keying his car.
8. Finalizing that you will never talk to him again.
Now that you have read something slightly humorous, I ask that you put up with me just a little bit longer.
I do not claim to be an expert on romance. God know's I've done my fair share of ruining good things myself. However, I have learned some from my many mistakes. I've gone through the "being jaded" phase, where I wouldn't let any guy into my heart. Believe me though, that is a mistake. The facts are these: Men will love you. Men will hurt you. Men will betray you. And one day, you will find the one you are meant to be with forever. He will love you. He will hurt you; but he will never betray you. "patience is a virtue."; it is a virtue that we should all strive to have. So I am not going to say that "one day your prince will come." I find that far to cliche. (besides, we all know that princes have major power trips. Egotism as well. I think it comes from "saving" to many maidens.) I will say this: One day, you will see clearly. I cannot say what you will see, or when this will h appen. It's different for everyone, but when it happens, everything will feel right, even if only for that moment.
As Always,
"vivo amare imparare"
~Hannah~
**********************************************************************************
This is one for all you cynics out there.
Why is it that so constantly, all of the seemingly "good" men out there are often attached to women who's IQ's are lower than Britney Spear's and Paris Hilton's IQ's pooled together? Come on ladies, Haven't most of us thought this at least once in our life, even if it was only for a moment? Is it because they feel impowered because they are smarter? (I use the word "smart" loosly) Is it all just a power trip? Do "they," those females who laugh at everything and seem to think only about nonsense really have anything we are incapable of posessing?
All of my writing up until this point seems to be nothing but a never ending stream of questions. However, I am now going to give some of my answers. First off, why do men choose the above described type of women? I do not have an answer for this. Now wait! Before you give up and decide not to read any further because I am dissapointing you, STOP! I am going to say something important. Ready? Not all men choose women like that. Just because he may appear "good" does not mean he is. Also, the type of woman a man chooses says alot about him.
What do you think when you see a guy who is out with a total, well, a total tramp? Do you think he is dating her to find out what her favourite book is? I think not. But there are a few "good" men out there who truely not only appear good, but indeed are. Ladies, what I am trying to say is this: THERE IS HOPE!! Do not settle. Never settle for less, because one of those good ones may come along one day and you will be taken, so he will move on.
Now, time for some tough love. Not all of the blame can be placed on men for dating the type of women I described earlier. You may complain and say that it is unfair that "he" would choose someone like that over you. But hear me now. There is always a reason. Now for that tough love. I said earlier, do they "really have anything we are incapable of posessing?" The answer to that is no. Flat out NO. However, they do have some things many of us often ignore as being important qualities when we are in a relationship.
1. A good sense of humor
2. Enjoying HIM. (don't panic! info to come.)
3. Having fun
Now as far as number one is concerned, a good sense of humor is key. Ok, now I am going to be a bit "harsh" as some of my friends call me. Many women refuse to find their man's jokes funny. Now, do not get me wrong, I know that alot of the time, they are not funny, but when they are, we often refuse to laugh. This is a strange phenomenon, but you must agree that it often occurs.
Number two. Enjoying HIM. Ok, this probably comes accross as confusing to some of you, but I will try to explain myself. Enjoy who he is, not who you want to make him into. Laugh at his dumb jokes. Love how he can make you laugh at anything. Tell him how much you adore that he can always cheer you up just by being there. LET him cheer you up. All these things seem totally simple right? that's because they are! We are often just to preoccupied with thinking because of that high IQ of our's that we forget to do the little things.
Number three. Have fun. I know what you are thinking. "She's kidding right? We all know how to have fun." Well I am not going to tell you how to have fun, but I am going to tell you it is something we often overlook. Why? Let me give you an example. You are cooking an amazing, romantic dinner for you and your significant other. The pasta burns. You spill sugar all over the floor. (OH MY GOSH!! ANTS!) And your precious dog decides to chew up your favourite pair of shoes. Therefore, he get's there and says, "let's go to the pizza parlor." Are you likely going to have much fun under the circumstances? No. Why? Because you are stressed out because you think everything was ruined for the night. Here is what you should learn to do. Let go of yourself. Have fun. Because, no matter where you are, what you are eating, or what you are wearing on your feet, all that matters is him. We get so stressed out that we forget to have fun. So remember to enjoy him, because it is the most important thing.
Just doing these three little things makes you more appealing to those "good" men. Why? Because they want the real you. Not the stressed out, compleatly not fun version you become once you have a boyfriend. Like I tell many people, my motto is "vivo amare imparare." English, "I live to love and to learn." Live your life. Love those people you have, and learn from that which you love so dearly.
Now as a fun, slightly demented and yet quirky side note, I would like to share a break up quote that one of my best friends shared with me.
There are phases of a break up
1. Not believing it's true.
2. Realizing it is true.
3. Crying because you feel as if you have lost your best f riend.
4. ANGER.
5. Considering thoughts of keying his car.
6. Keying his car with your friends.
7. Regretting keying his car.
8. Finalizing that you will never talk to him again.
Now that you have read something slightly humorous, I ask that you put up with me just a little bit longer.
I do not claim to be an expert on romance. God know's I've done my fair share of ruining good things myself. However, I have learned some from my many mistakes. I've gone through the "being jaded" phase, where I wouldn't let any guy into my heart. Believe me though, that is a mistake. The facts are these: Men will love you. Men will hurt you. Men will betray you. And one day, you will find the one you are meant to be with forever. He will love you. He will hurt you; but he will never betray you. "patience is a virtue."; it is a virtue that we should all strive to have. So I am not going to say that "one day your prince will come." I find that far to cliche. (besides, we all know that princes have major power trips. Egotism as well. I think it comes from "saving" to many maidens.) I will say this: One day, you will see clearly. I cannot say what you will see, or when this will h appen. It's different for everyone, but when it happens, everything will feel right, even if only for that moment.
As Always,
"vivo amare imparare"
~Hannah~
Sunday, April 27, 2008
Broken hearts and peace of mind
Well, so much for writing a new blog everyday. Goodness, I have been so busy lately! Life is crazy, terrible, exciting, new, and everything else you can think of. So, I hope you are all ready for a very long update.
I will start off with work. Work is going well. I am starting to not worry so much because I'm getting better at knowing everything I'm supposed to do. Not having the training for it kind of sucks, but I'm making it through. I have made some new friends there. My boss is telling me I'm amazing and that I'm one of the best baggers they've ever had there. Hearing stuff like that makes me happy, and makes me think I must be doing alright. You know how sometimes, there are people that you just click with the moment you meet them? I do. There is this one guy I work with... Now before I go any farther, get the thought out of your head that this is about someone I have a crush on... because, it is not. Anyway, this guy I work with is really fun, and he is always happy, and he and I make a great team. It's nice having someone like that. When you like the people you work with, it almost doesn't seem like work. Anyway, whenever we are working a register together, people always come through, and if they are grumpy when they get into the line, they by no means leave feeling or acting the same way. We are their quote "sideshow" to shopping. In short, we put on a show for them and they leave feeling entertained. Now I must say, that does not go unnoticed by our boss. So we are always getting compliments for our teamwork.
Well that's it for what I have to say about work. Now, as for other parts of my life, they are not going so great. I recently found out that someone I really cared about is not a christian. For me, my faith is the most important thing in my life. If it were not for God, I would not be here. If it were not for God, I would go to hell. I can't even begin to get accross in words how much it has impacted me to find out that someone I love, as a friend, does not share that faith with me. He even lied to me about it ever since I met them. He has grown up lying to everyone. He grew up going to church, youth events, and he grew up in a family of believers, and has been lying to all of us. Now, I do not want to offend those who do not believe in God, but this is my blog, about my life and my faith, therefore I will say that which I believe. My friend, is an Athiest. For those of you who have not learned what that is, an Athiest is one who does not believe in the existance of God, or any "god's" for that matter. The fact that this friend has chosen to not accept Christ has left me broken hearted in every way imaginable. I have had a part of my world torn apart, and was left feeling useless. But that feeling of despair and uselessness brought me to a reality check. I realized just how much I rely on God for the my very existance. Without him, my life is in vain. There is nothing I can do in my own strength, and He provides everything for me. There is nothing I can say to this friend that he has not heard already, and even if I could say anything that he has not heard, it is in vain unless God opens his eyes and heart to those words. I often take for granted the life I've been given, but through this trial God has been drawing me closer and closer to Him. I do not know what the future holds for this friendship, but I do know that whatever may come, God is in control of it all. To my friends out there who read this, I ask you to pray. You may or may not know this person I am talking about, but even if you do not, I ask you to pray. God does answer prayers; and I have been begging him to answer mine. Please pray for me also, I have not been holding up all that great under this, and I need all the support I can get.
Now that I have spilled about everything going on with my faith as of recently, I want to say what has been going on with my heart. It is amazing to see how God works in me. Many of you who have known me a very long time remember that I have not always been the girl who is patient and waits on God to give someone to her to love. I have always been a "go getter." I've been the girl who would like someone and she would go after them. Well, I am not like that anymore. I have learned through many trials I have been going through lately that God does know what is best for me. I have come to the realization that he will provide for all of my needs. I just have to trust Him and have the patience to do so. After a recent experience of having my heart broken, I was left feeling, not empty, or without a purpose, but feeling that God has something, someone, better out there for me. I do not have that desire to go after just anyone anymore. That is saying something for those of you who know who I was. I know that whatever God has in store for me, is the best possible, and I take an extreme amount of peace in that.
Well my friends, that is all for the world outside my window for today. I hope that you have learned something from my life that you can apply to yours.
As always,
"vivo amare imparare"
~Hannah~
I will start off with work. Work is going well. I am starting to not worry so much because I'm getting better at knowing everything I'm supposed to do. Not having the training for it kind of sucks, but I'm making it through. I have made some new friends there. My boss is telling me I'm amazing and that I'm one of the best baggers they've ever had there. Hearing stuff like that makes me happy, and makes me think I must be doing alright. You know how sometimes, there are people that you just click with the moment you meet them? I do. There is this one guy I work with... Now before I go any farther, get the thought out of your head that this is about someone I have a crush on... because, it is not. Anyway, this guy I work with is really fun, and he is always happy, and he and I make a great team. It's nice having someone like that. When you like the people you work with, it almost doesn't seem like work. Anyway, whenever we are working a register together, people always come through, and if they are grumpy when they get into the line, they by no means leave feeling or acting the same way. We are their quote "sideshow" to shopping. In short, we put on a show for them and they leave feeling entertained. Now I must say, that does not go unnoticed by our boss. So we are always getting compliments for our teamwork.
Well that's it for what I have to say about work. Now, as for other parts of my life, they are not going so great. I recently found out that someone I really cared about is not a christian. For me, my faith is the most important thing in my life. If it were not for God, I would not be here. If it were not for God, I would go to hell. I can't even begin to get accross in words how much it has impacted me to find out that someone I love, as a friend, does not share that faith with me. He even lied to me about it ever since I met them. He has grown up lying to everyone. He grew up going to church, youth events, and he grew up in a family of believers, and has been lying to all of us. Now, I do not want to offend those who do not believe in God, but this is my blog, about my life and my faith, therefore I will say that which I believe. My friend, is an Athiest. For those of you who have not learned what that is, an Athiest is one who does not believe in the existance of God, or any "god's" for that matter. The fact that this friend has chosen to not accept Christ has left me broken hearted in every way imaginable. I have had a part of my world torn apart, and was left feeling useless. But that feeling of despair and uselessness brought me to a reality check. I realized just how much I rely on God for the my very existance. Without him, my life is in vain. There is nothing I can do in my own strength, and He provides everything for me. There is nothing I can say to this friend that he has not heard already, and even if I could say anything that he has not heard, it is in vain unless God opens his eyes and heart to those words. I often take for granted the life I've been given, but through this trial God has been drawing me closer and closer to Him. I do not know what the future holds for this friendship, but I do know that whatever may come, God is in control of it all. To my friends out there who read this, I ask you to pray. You may or may not know this person I am talking about, but even if you do not, I ask you to pray. God does answer prayers; and I have been begging him to answer mine. Please pray for me also, I have not been holding up all that great under this, and I need all the support I can get.
Now that I have spilled about everything going on with my faith as of recently, I want to say what has been going on with my heart. It is amazing to see how God works in me. Many of you who have known me a very long time remember that I have not always been the girl who is patient and waits on God to give someone to her to love. I have always been a "go getter." I've been the girl who would like someone and she would go after them. Well, I am not like that anymore. I have learned through many trials I have been going through lately that God does know what is best for me. I have come to the realization that he will provide for all of my needs. I just have to trust Him and have the patience to do so. After a recent experience of having my heart broken, I was left feeling, not empty, or without a purpose, but feeling that God has something, someone, better out there for me. I do not have that desire to go after just anyone anymore. That is saying something for those of you who know who I was. I know that whatever God has in store for me, is the best possible, and I take an extreme amount of peace in that.
Well my friends, that is all for the world outside my window for today. I hope that you have learned something from my life that you can apply to yours.
As always,
"vivo amare imparare"
~Hannah~
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Run for your life!
Wow. Well as you can see it has been a few days since my last post. I will now attempt to give you my reason and make it into a somewhat enjoyable blog. *evil grin*
Well let's see, tuesday I started my first day of training at Trader Joes. It was fun, exciting, slightly confusing, and mostly, above all, it was exhausting!
I am being trained by a girl who is only about a year older than I am, so we get along really well. I learned to bag, do cart runs, (running around the parking lot bringing the carts back to the store) cleaning, stocking, and lots of miscellaneous things around the store. I must say, four hours on your feet with only a fifteen minute break, now that is exhausting. It is especially exhausting because you are not just standing in one place the whole time. You are running around the store trying to find stuff for customers, you are running through the parking lot dodging crazy people driving cars they should never be allowed to get behind the wheel of in the first place, you are dealing with really mean (mind you only a few) customers who no matter what you do they think you are doing a terrible job, and you are playing the part of a happy camper all day.
I did not realize how intense the job would be. I will freely admit I did not expect to be running for my life the first day. (dodging crazy drivers remember) However, it is very rewarding. I love the people I'm working with even more now that I have gotten to know them better. My boss is still great. He even gave me and my trainer free lunch because he thought I was doing so amazingly on my first day. I did not mention the heavy lifting they have you do. Ok, maybe not "heavy" for a guy; but for a girl, man it get's old really fast! lifting 25 pound cubes of paper bags and loading them onto dollys and carting them to the front of the store and unloading them and distributing them to the registers is probably at this moment my least favorite part of the job. But hey, my arms are looking good already. *hehe*
Now, I know alot of you out there who read my blog have jobs. Maybe you are a hard working career person who spends their day in the office. Maybe you spend your day cooking food in a diner. There is one thing however that makes work better for each and every one of us no matter what our field; that thing is great co-workers!!! If you have to work with someone who is a complete ass you are not going to enjoy your life. If you work with someone whom you get along with and like being around, you are going to feel alot better about going into work each time.
These are just my thoughts for the day. And that's it for the world oustide my window.
As always,
"vivo amare imparare"
~Hannah
Well let's see, tuesday I started my first day of training at Trader Joes. It was fun, exciting, slightly confusing, and mostly, above all, it was exhausting!
I am being trained by a girl who is only about a year older than I am, so we get along really well. I learned to bag, do cart runs, (running around the parking lot bringing the carts back to the store) cleaning, stocking, and lots of miscellaneous things around the store. I must say, four hours on your feet with only a fifteen minute break, now that is exhausting. It is especially exhausting because you are not just standing in one place the whole time. You are running around the store trying to find stuff for customers, you are running through the parking lot dodging crazy people driving cars they should never be allowed to get behind the wheel of in the first place, you are dealing with really mean (mind you only a few) customers who no matter what you do they think you are doing a terrible job, and you are playing the part of a happy camper all day.
I did not realize how intense the job would be. I will freely admit I did not expect to be running for my life the first day. (dodging crazy drivers remember) However, it is very rewarding. I love the people I'm working with even more now that I have gotten to know them better. My boss is still great. He even gave me and my trainer free lunch because he thought I was doing so amazingly on my first day. I did not mention the heavy lifting they have you do. Ok, maybe not "heavy" for a guy; but for a girl, man it get's old really fast! lifting 25 pound cubes of paper bags and loading them onto dollys and carting them to the front of the store and unloading them and distributing them to the registers is probably at this moment my least favorite part of the job. But hey, my arms are looking good already. *hehe*
Now, I know alot of you out there who read my blog have jobs. Maybe you are a hard working career person who spends their day in the office. Maybe you spend your day cooking food in a diner. There is one thing however that makes work better for each and every one of us no matter what our field; that thing is great co-workers!!! If you have to work with someone who is a complete ass you are not going to enjoy your life. If you work with someone whom you get along with and like being around, you are going to feel alot better about going into work each time.
These are just my thoughts for the day. And that's it for the world oustide my window.
As always,
"vivo amare imparare"
~Hannah
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Responsibility
So today is just going to be me talking about my life. I know this is not the typical type of writing I do. I usually talk about certain topics relevent to most people's lives, but today I am going to talk about myself.
So I have come to a realization about my family. The more I grow up and become more independent, the more my parents pull me in every direction trying to keep my their little girl. They stretch me to the max just to prove that I'm not mature enough to deal with things in life and that I should still rely on them. Does this seem wrong to anyone else besides me?
I mean come on. I understand parents being hard pressed to let their little girl, their last born grow up, because they are scared to lose her. No, I do not have a problem with that, but when they purposely try to stretch you out in all areas of your life just so that you won't want to go, now that is something I have a problem with!
I am a fairly independent person. I have a job, a car, I can pay for my own food if I need to, I'm not required to pay rent yet because I'm only 16 and my parents are not going to charge me untill I am 18, but I could pay rent if required. Yet, even though I am proving that I am learning to be mature and responsible with finances, with people, and with my life in general, they still feel they should treat me as a child. I understand certain restrictions on things I should be allowed to and not allowed to do. I am only 16 afterall; but I don't think I should be treated as if I am not mature, responsible, independent, or intelligent!
Now you may think that this is just another teenage girl venting on her parents. We all do that sometimes, but that's not what I am trying to do right now. Yes, I will admit that there is a certain amount of hostility in this blog, but that is mostly because of the load of stress I am under right now. My point to most of this is just this simple: What one of my views of the role of a parent should be is this, a parent is the one who gives you life, but they should also train you up to be a mature and responsible adult so that you can be independent and function in the world on your own. I think that a person who does not do this really is not accomplishing their role. My parents should be teaching me the skills I need in life and the responsibility to use them so that I can live on my own. This is what I think all parents should be doing.
Lately I've been under alot of stress because I have a new job. I got this job so that I could save up to move out. My parents know that this is my plan, and they have also been fighting me on the subject of moving out ever since I first brought it up. Therefore, they are happy that I got this job, but also unhappy at the same time because they know what I am saving the money for. So in return they have been putting alot of strain on me to do things and not do things just because they want me to depend on them more. They restrict me from alot more things than they used to, and they require more of me than I think should be required.
Well, this is just a little bit about my life right now. I do have alot more to say but alas I do not have the time to type it out right now. Hey, who knows, maybe I'll write a book someday. Well as for now, this is just the world outside my window.
As always,
"vivo amare imparare"
Hannah
So I have come to a realization about my family. The more I grow up and become more independent, the more my parents pull me in every direction trying to keep my their little girl. They stretch me to the max just to prove that I'm not mature enough to deal with things in life and that I should still rely on them. Does this seem wrong to anyone else besides me?
I mean come on. I understand parents being hard pressed to let their little girl, their last born grow up, because they are scared to lose her. No, I do not have a problem with that, but when they purposely try to stretch you out in all areas of your life just so that you won't want to go, now that is something I have a problem with!
I am a fairly independent person. I have a job, a car, I can pay for my own food if I need to, I'm not required to pay rent yet because I'm only 16 and my parents are not going to charge me untill I am 18, but I could pay rent if required. Yet, even though I am proving that I am learning to be mature and responsible with finances, with people, and with my life in general, they still feel they should treat me as a child. I understand certain restrictions on things I should be allowed to and not allowed to do. I am only 16 afterall; but I don't think I should be treated as if I am not mature, responsible, independent, or intelligent!
Now you may think that this is just another teenage girl venting on her parents. We all do that sometimes, but that's not what I am trying to do right now. Yes, I will admit that there is a certain amount of hostility in this blog, but that is mostly because of the load of stress I am under right now. My point to most of this is just this simple: What one of my views of the role of a parent should be is this, a parent is the one who gives you life, but they should also train you up to be a mature and responsible adult so that you can be independent and function in the world on your own. I think that a person who does not do this really is not accomplishing their role. My parents should be teaching me the skills I need in life and the responsibility to use them so that I can live on my own. This is what I think all parents should be doing.
Lately I've been under alot of stress because I have a new job. I got this job so that I could save up to move out. My parents know that this is my plan, and they have also been fighting me on the subject of moving out ever since I first brought it up. Therefore, they are happy that I got this job, but also unhappy at the same time because they know what I am saving the money for. So in return they have been putting alot of strain on me to do things and not do things just because they want me to depend on them more. They restrict me from alot more things than they used to, and they require more of me than I think should be required.
Well, this is just a little bit about my life right now. I do have alot more to say but alas I do not have the time to type it out right now. Hey, who knows, maybe I'll write a book someday. Well as for now, this is just the world outside my window.
As always,
"vivo amare imparare"
Hannah
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